We Need Dr. King--a model of civility

I walk past the Mystery and Fiction sections in the Milwaukee Public Library. I’m looking for a Scottish mystery.  I’m in a hurry.   I’m parked in a 15 minute zone out front. And then it happened......The King Center Imaging Project.

Up pops a 15’ by 15’ enclosed exhibit about Martin Luther King Jr.  And it’s not even February (Black History Month) or April 4th (King’s death.) It is, however, the 49th anniversary of the March on Washington and the “I Have a Dream Speech.”   But,  I’d not heard of this exhibit.  Little or no publicity.   And this is its last of three days here.

Only one other person is examining the exhibit, but I am eagerly pursued and then welcomed by a young man  who explains the options, and there are many, for interacting with Dr. King, the Movement, his family and friends, and the times.   You pull out drawers and examine  ‘sermons’, ‘speeches’, ‘family life’ etc.  There are visual projections of Dr. King speaking and a half-dozen computers geared to take you to any of a dozen different aspects of his life.  They emphasize his childhood, education, church and community involvement, and, of course, his principle contribution as leader of the Civil Rights Movement.

I circled the exhibit catching bits and pieces of things he had said. Then I was gradually drawn closer and closer to his writings, his letters--both personal and public--and his speeches and sermons.

I simply was blown away. Awestruck.  And this is not the first time I have been encountered and moved by Dr. King.  I have to take account of this once more.  I participated in Dr. King’s Chicago march protesting the Vietnam War, cheered him at the packed houses of Chicago’s Southside black churches, and felt a small, but important part of this history in the making.  More recently I have read some of his writings, the biographies by Taylor Branch, and shake my head at the gradual watering down of his message.

Adding to the struggle, is that this significant exhibit is ‘An Initiative of JP Morgan Chase and Co.’  Yes, that’s Jamie Dimon’s money.  How hard it is to have clean hands.  Impossible, even.

Nevertheless, however the message of truth and clarity came, it came, again.  I have been thinking about what ‘history of the United States‘ I want my grandchildren to know.  I definitely want them to know about the slave trade, slavery, the removal of Native Americans to make room for the rest of us, the genius of the men and women who did create the American system and the Civil War over slavery.  I want them to know about Reconstruction (a return to a more subtle slavery), I want them to know of the participation of African-Americans and Native Americans in defending the United States in its wars,  I want them to know about the Great Depression, and  about the unknown and known military men and women of the two great  World Wars, and I want them to know about Dr. King and the Civil Rights Movement.  Of course there is more.  And there is context.  But there are key events that have shaped our country more than others.  And perhaps none more than the Civil Rights Movement led and taught by Dr. King.

I do not want these true stories of our history to be either forgotten or stuck in the quagmire of the game we see acted by public officials now to avoid the truth. I mean the  ‘everyone has a right to their own facts’ debates.  Neither do I  want to deflect the deep reality of these facts by turning them into guilt trips about racism--the facts are plain enough.  They need telling but not enhancing or sermonizing. 

In my next ‘blog’ I intend to point to the things I learned, again, at the exhibit today.  Things that give me a model of clear thinking, not just about 49 years ago, but about today.  I am convinced that Dr. King’s greatness lies in both his courageous leadership, but also in the timeless and the straightforward truth telling that is so lacking today even in the leaders whom I admire and will vote for.  Now is the time to advocate for an emphasis in education that is about history (historical accuracy to the best of our ability) and justice (placing life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness within the reach of all.) 

'Prominent' Voices Alter Reality

" I do not see how we will get beyond it (polarization) unless some very prominent voices speak out - or unless we can develop a network of voices to which people will listen."

I received this response after I posted some comments on a 'Beyond Polarization' dialogue project. What particularly struck me is the phrase 'prominent voices.'  Who are they and how can we get them to speak out to overcome this polarization?  Are prominent persons those in the public sphere who can speak out and hopefully be heard more readily than you or I?  Are we part of that 'network' referred to in the second half of the lead in quote?

Two 'prominent' people who have made a good effort to use their positions in this way are Sen. Dale Schultz (Republican) and Sen. Tim Cullen (Democrat) who serve through the Wisconsin legislature in Madison.  They offer an alternative vision for Wisconsin politics to that being represented at the Republican convention.

Wisconsin is on the national political map for having Gov. Scott Walker emerge as a Republican hero, Reince Priebus chairing the RNC and now, of course, Paul Ryan being the nominee for Vice-President. It may or may not be unprecedented, but it identifies Wisconsin as a state that is moving rapidly to the right and in a position to influence the national political reality. More 'balance' (a lot more) is needed.

Little known, I'm guessing, is the effort of these two Wisconsin state senators to actively construct a new kind of conversation that brings civil conversation to the fore.  Schultz is from the Western part of the state and Cullen, who interestingly graduated from the same Janesville Craig High School as Paul Ryan.  Craig is also the alma mater of recently defeated Senator Russ Feingold, perhaps the last of the 'old-time' liberals.  I must visit Janesville sometime.  And Priebus is 'just down the road' 71 miles from Janesville is Kenosha.  All that 'prominence' from tiny southeast Wisconsin!  Take that East and West coast! Whoops, forget that, "build bridges, cross aisles, don't stereotype."  It's hard.  But these guys are giving it a good shot.

Schultz and Cullen began about a year ago to put forth a bi-partisan image.  They travelled the state having forums during which they acknowledged differences, but emphasized what kinds of things they could work together on for the citizens of the State of Wisconsin.  This included issues dealing with the environment, health care, and especially the business environment and changing the direction of the economy.

The citizen response to them has been muted.  Nevertheless, they continue to go public in a bi-partisan way and there are some indications that others in power positions are watching, listening, and perhaps moving a bit themselves to connect better with those who seem to be on opposite sides.

I think it's important that they hear from us that 'we want what they're having.' ( a play on "When Harry Met Sally")

Here is a link to a news story describing their recent activity.
http://www.fox11online.com/dpp/news/local/green_bay/both-sides-civility-in-government

By supporting these 'prominent' legislators in creating a third way, we can be part of a network of persons across the country who directly advocate for more of the 'Schultz-Cullen' dream.  Identify potential partners in your local and state government and provide the 'Schultz-Cullen' model as a place to begin.

May the other guys from Janesville be as encouraging.

http://www.fox11online.com/dpp/news/local/green_bay/both-sides-civility-in-government

Email your supportive word to:

Dale Schultz:  senatordaleschultz.com

Tim Cullen: legis.wisconsin.gov/w3asp/contact/legislatorpages.aspx?

Healthy Relationships

There is an apocryphal account of a guy who puts a billboard on a little traveled road that spells out in twenty foot letters S-E-X. The story goes that within days the volume of traffic skyrocketed and the accident rate increased substantially.  This story emerged during the nascent 'sexual revolution' of the 1960's so today's public may not be so susceptible.  Nevertheless, S-E-X can still be an attention grabber.  You can depend on some sex-related outrage surrounding the political conventions.  And sex abuse in families, churches and schools is a pretty serious matter.   Sex is as American as well...

So hope the backers of two current films, "Hope Springs" and "Your Sister's Sister." I assume 'Hope' is going for a good portion of the 55 plus age group while 'Sister' aims a generation or two younger. The story lines are driven by exploring relationships based on sexual attraction or alienation.

These are good hearted stories that will be enjoyed by a wide-range of audiences.  The first, 'Hope', follows a couple, married 31 years, from their repetitive, hum drum existence in Omaha to a week long intensive marriage therapy session in Great Hope Springs, Maine.   Kay (Meryl Streep) basically drags Albert  (Tommy Lee Jones) to the therapist hoping to save the marriage.  Ms. Streep and Mr. Jones are among the class actors of our time.  'Your Sister's" is a three-some (or something). Three 30-ish young people, linked by friendship and kinship, are each in their own ways lost and alone.  Iris(Emily Blunt), Jack(Mark Duplass) and Hannah(Rosemarie DeWitt) work well in difficult roles. They end up together in an isolated retreat hideaway on Puget Sound.  Maine and the Puget Sound provide beautiful natural landscapes, the kind of places we go for 'healing'.

Each of the five primary characters is  out to find a cure for their empty spirits so that life can go on.  Albert and Kay have drifted way apart and need a major intervention to re-discover and re-ignite the passion that first birthed their love.  Or not.  In 'Sister'  the death of Jack's brother has left him in a year long funk.  He can only be angry.  He can't bring himself to tell Iris that he loves her.  Iris mourns her lack of courage to openly admit that she loves Jack.  Hannah, the sister,  has just left a 7-year lesbian relationship. No one of them has anything else in their lives that seems to matter.  They are stuck trying to wade through the relative complexities of their connects and disconnects, but have a tiny prism to look through.

Why does S-E-X so dominate the meaning of their lives?  Our lives?  (I'm going to take a break now to 'delete' the 75--no kidding--e-mails that come daily to get me to buy viagra or look at available partners) Is this the 'heart of the matter?'   Albert and Kay's Omaha  a 1950's kind of gender stereotyping of couples in their 60's probably exists.  The 'cluelessness' is funny, but pretty sad this late in the game.  I've heard that most of Omaha has been liberated.   And even if you go to the center of Puget Sound to work on your life, there must be other things that interest one after 25 years living in Seattle, often mentioned as one of the 'ten best places to live' in the U.S.   Isn't life more than getting one's sex lives straight?  Is our obsession another way we think we can at least have control over something?  The power of sex and the many ways it informs our lives is not to be minimized.  We've done harmful things to ourselves and others because openness and honesty have not been my or our strong suit in discussing it.   These films bring a healthy perspective that is accessible to many of us.  Persons near my age in 'Sister' laughed like school kids enjoying a guilty pleasure.  Maybe if we were more open, the pre-occupation would lessen and we could be about other things as well.  Films can be a context for that conversation.

Beyond Polarization

We had waited a long time for this event to actually take place other than in our imaginations.  As part of a group sponsoring a public conversation named "Beyond Polarization", we were excited.  Some would say that no time in U.S. history has the population been more polarized.  I'm not sure where the years surrounding the Civil War, the long divisions over slavery, or possibly the Vietnam War fit in here.  Those were pretty divided times.  Some lasting effects of all of those divisions seems to have survived.  So to proclaim our time as the most polarized may be a stretch.  Last evening, the "Beyond Polarization" conversation began with a short presentation of charts and graphs and numbers which suggest that if polarization is pointing to hard line separation,  our divisions are serious.  And they will be there after the elections this November.  They may even become wider and deeper.  Welcome to the doomsday scenario.   Somebody is clearly out to get us (I don't know how to put a smiley face at the end of this comment.)  The planning team's wait has been dominated by our hope that of the twenty people we expected that the divide in our country would be represented.  Thankfully our hope was accompanied by some very hard work by the event coordinator--the work of one-on-one conversations, of approaching groups and individuals from across the political spectrum.  Of the twenty, I had five in a small group for which I provided facilitation of discussion of the experience and meaning of 'polarization.'  That was typical of the four small groups.  We had succeeded in the recruitment phase. By guiding a 'neutral' facilitation method, I sat on my emotions as the group introduced their Tea Party, Libertarian, Independent choices.   Not one claimed either of the two dominant parties. But FINALLY we had the opportunity to explore polarization with real people with very different points of view. We had racial, gender, and age mixes--not anyone really younger than 40.  The conversation was certainly civil and passionate. Emotions and strong feelings or definite opinions weren't spared, but were shared with respect.  The issues of concern were local and national.  The key agreement among the group is that information comes at us at lightning speed and we have limited tools to evaluate the facts.  Information is more likely heard as support or opposition of a point of view we already hold.  The relationship to the sources of information are not built on trust and there is a sense that someone else is controlling the game for their own purposes.  We hope to follow up with this task.  I have done similar groups, with less opposing views, however, for many years.  I am always a little frustrated by the lack of resolution or sense of a common commitment.  The participants are courageous and insightful regardless of their persuasion.  We avoid 'next step' talk because we don't have a program or a vehicle to channel the energy.  We only now how to work together when we agree.  What is it that we can agree upon that will focus the energy and passion we have for overcoming the great divide that we live in?  Is it citizenship as Parker Palmer suggests?  I like that.  How do we insert that into the conversation process without circumventing the necessary discovery and sharing of our own experience that has led us to this point?  Perhaps that is the heart of the matter!

The Heart of the Matter

In naming a blog, I wanted to find an image that did not commit itself to a political ideology.  So for now I share reflections on 'the heart of the matter.'  A method for civil discourse developed by "The Public Conversations Project" has a basic question of inquiry that asks, "What is the heart of the matter?"  That question, more than any other, invites us to think more deeply about the why of our experience.  It is not the why of justification (why did you do this or think this?) but the why of inquiry (what is at stake for you?).  I was also looking for an image that finally gives no final or correct answer.  A discussion about the heart can only end in the unknown.  We can probe and seek more and more in depth, and that can serve us well.  But at some point we see that there is no bottom.  The inquiry into the depth, into the heart comes up empty every time in the end.  That does not make the quest pointless or a waste of time.  What we discover and recover along the way can be of great value. It is the wonder of our existence.   Human beings have always wanted to go to the heart of the matter.  As discoveries about life are made,  stories are told, songs are sung, symbols are created, all of which can only point to the ever deepening mystery that life is.  Religions spring up out of attempts to put all of these discoveries into a system, something that will give us answers or at least security.  It is not to be. This natural human exercise often reduces our multiple experiences into rituals we can repeat or art we can gaze at.   Much of this creation is beautiful and meaningful as well as seductive. The quest for the heart of the matter often is  reduced to something we can understand or hold on to.  True believers may seek to convince others that the truth has been found but 'the heart of the matter' cannot be captured in a book or a group.  My commitment to sharing in this context is to be guided by both my limited experience and my limited truth.  My life is filled with important stories, songs, drama, ritual and community-building vehicles.  Through them my life has been affirmed and I have received tools that have made the journey of my life significant.  At the same time these very life-giving tools tempt me to narrow life down to something I can handle. I want to proclaim more profound truth than humans are given.  To discover together the significance of each life and our life together is a grand invitation.  It is an ambiguous task. It is the stuff of humility, gratitude and compassion.  That is the heart of the matter.

A Marshall Plan for Dysfunctional Neighborhoods

"The Interrupters" is a documentary from Frontline.  It chronicles the lives of residents living in dysfunctional families, institutions and neighborhoods in Chicago.  Some will say 'you really need to see this.'  I guess so.  It is 'good.'  But I am reacting to it not as more fuel for 'we should be doing something' argument.  I've heard and told this story for the last 50 years beginning in the same Chicago neighborhoods.  And this story is not only about Chicago or cities.  Try our Native communities, too.  The story is about young, middle-aged, and older people, mostly African-American who live their lives in poverty.  But as William Julius Wilson, the sociologist observes, this is a different kind of poverty.  And I find myself frustrated and paralyzed regarding 'solutions.'  This kind of poverty begs the question of simplistic solutions(throwing money at the problem) or targeting blame( pull yourself up by your own bootstraps.)  The polarized camps of those who subscribe to 'self-help' only on the one hand or those who advocate for social programs on the other, does not lead to fruitful dialogue. The resources of these communities have been reduced to money, drugs, guns, and survival tribes.  Safety and security are rare.  Desperation oozes from every encounter.  The mildest of commentary, neighbor to neighbor,  is seen as an attack on self-hood. "Your talking about my cousin." Such a remark produces at best a fist fight, at worst a retaliation ending in severe injury or death.   Is this a judgement?  Yes. In  the sense that every attempt to describe carries within it judgement. Any comment carries with it a note of judgement.  No, it is a description.  This 'wrap-around kind of poverty' has so far eluded all attempts at help.  This poverty reigns even as noble efforts are made to recapture and ignite the human dignity which has been tromped on or gone quiet.   We're talking about decades of isolation.  The dominant (not only) myth of the neighborhood is survival.  These surroundings do not suggest that other opportunities exist.   There are attempts at providing alternatives.  Community does exist through street gangs, churches, families, schools and other programs. But a steady comprehensive community building strategy is lacking.   Individuals are on their own, left to prey on others.  An August 2012 article in the New York Times  about President Obama and the Rosedale community in Chicago describes the President's history in proposing some policies to address these settings.  Now, however, no mention of 'poverty' or the 'poor' shows up in the campaign speeches of either party.  We need a new 'war on poverty' but it needs a name and description that actually describes the reality and does not get lost in superficial solutions from the left or right.   We did the Marshall Plan to rebuild Europe.  We keep having successes in outer space.  Every one of us has a stake in finding better alternatives for our citizens caught up in dysfunctional neighborhoods.  Does any party deserve our vote if they are not envisioning some kind of national commitment to framing the situation of the least among us as a priority?  That is the Heart of the Matter.

Time to Begin

"I don't like that tone of voice, mister!"  Not infrequently do I remember my mom warning me that my next disrespectful comment might well be my last.  I wasn't that difficult a kid, but a lack of civility  could creep into our discourse from time to time.  As we continue to find ways to find the path for civil discourse in our many and varied settings, the tone of the conversation bothers me more than my argument with the content.  It seems that honest disagreement about a political candidate or an issue escalates very quickly into nastiness, name calling, and over emotional reactions.  The so-called public discussion resembles a winner take all contest held in an outdoor arena where death is the desire for the pre-decided enemy.  What shall we do? Part of our common vocabulary are phrases like "take a deep breath" or "take a pill."  You hear these when it is clear that someone is on the verge of breaking a blood vessel.  Now is the time to take a step back and consider our common future.  We will not do that without some commitment to our city, country and world.  It appears that few schools teach civics ie. how society functions and the role of responsible citizenship.  And does anyone teach civil behavior?  Yes, I'm talking about the basics like saying 'please' and 'thank you.'  But I'm also talking about having enough regard for other human beings that we 'take a deep breath' and invite those with whom we disagree to sit a table with us for a 'time to reason together." The Heart of the Matter is  to practice creative, curious (learning from someone else, especially one who views things differently) and listening and responding to each new situation.

Being Caught Off Guard

I'm a long time member of the local YMCA.   A 70 or so year old guy named E. is at the main check-in desk most days.  I've known E. for the ten years he has been at the Y.  We enjoy conversation, mostly small talk, but occasionally we share a movie we've seen or travel we've done. He's not a close friend, but he is a friend and is important to me and to others.    He is the first contact one has at the Y so his calm, laid back and caring demeanor gets your workout going on a positive note.  Today he asked me if I had a Kindle.  He said if I did I could read a book he has just written.  What?  I was taken completely off guard.  Not because I don't have a Kindle, but because I didn't quite connect E. with being a writer, much less a novelist.  Even though book writing seems as common as washing the dishes these days, I'm still impressed by those who get published.  I asked him to give me the name of the book as well as his full name.  I only knew him as E.  When I got home I googled his name and came up with nothing.  I figured he had been April fooling me in the middle of August.  He had given me his two initials and a last name I don't think anyone has.   It's the name of a numeral, like three or eight.  E. J. Seven?  You must be kidding.  Just to be thorough I ran the book's name through Amazon and BINGO.  There was his bio and the summary of a 2012 book, a 275 page tale of adventure of an international intrigue kind of character based in New York  and his cat.   I downloaded the kindle content on my MacBook Pro.  I am really excited about getting into it. How much richer my life is with this new understanding of an old friend.  Even more admirable is his humility--he has written scripts for several Broadway productions and acted as well.  He's not a celebrity, probably never was.  He's better. He's a part-time employee at the Y who politely makes sure everyone has a good day because of his hospitality.   Somehow that strikes me as the 'Heart of the Matter.'  Do you have a Kindle? The book is called, "Aldo's Dream" by E.L. Six.

A Poisonous Situation

A news headline today described the current U.S. election campaign as 'poisonous.'  Do any of us want to live in that kind of toxicity? The film 'Coriolanus' featuring Ralph Fiennes and Vanessa Redgrave stirs the soul with Shakespeare's genius presented in a contemporary setting. The disdain that Coriolanus has for the people resembles  not only the class divisions of society but the cultural wars.  He is a self-made hero dependent on no one, neither their praise or condemnation will defeat him. His oversimplified warrior mentality is only challenged by his devotion to his ambitious mother.  The crowds are fickle and win no sympathy either.  They have no solutions, only a desire to vent their frustration.  Their support depends primarily on emotion and their victimization. When we cannot relate to our situation in any creative way, we poison our lives.  It raises the question of our representative democracy.  Are we in this together or do we all only desire things on our own terms?  Our political races are about far more than electing the candidate who pleases us the most.  Is that the 'Heart of the Matter?'

Motivation

Graham Greene's novel "The Heart of the Matter" looks at the human condition in a primal sort of way.  He has great insight into how we function when we run into our limits.  Do we try to create ways to withstand those difficulties?  Or  do we find excuses and blame the conditions that trap us rather than admitting that we have little control over what happens to us and move forward with a  'nevertheless?'  He thinks some people understandably stop trusting that things will change--that grief, despair, and oppression will always dominate our lives.   Greene writes of a kind of 'happiness' that breaks into life from time to time.  His happiness is a blink in time and quickly passes, passing quickly away, unknown  if not acknowledged immediately. These 'happiness' moments happen too seldom and only last a nano second, so it is important to be aware and looking for it. It may come right now for instance not for hours, days or weeks.   We cannot force this moment to happen, but we can recognize, elevate it and even find sustenance from these brief glimpses that can move us to our next responsibility, to grasp our identity, and to celebrate life when no one else understands what we're up to.  In his novel, "The Power and the Glory", this becomes the pattern for his 'whisky priest', an ongoing redemption that resembles condemnation.  No, it's not rational.  It's trust.  Greene seems to suggest that as the 'Heart of the Matter.'

The name of these musings is "Heart of the Matter." My involvement in concerns of citizenship from the neighborhood to international level will shape these posts.  It will tend to be serendipitous, triggered by events of the day and the experiences I am having.  Moving from the mundane out or perhaps down is the 'Heart of the Matter." (HOTM).